Circles

Its been a busy couple of days, decided to go and visit ,
It was good , to go do something different, Had to get ,
away from the keys, In the olden days? it would of been,
 your gran knitting now its the clicketty click of the keys,
Sounds like you are knitting from a big yarn of wool,
As the words flow clicketty click they go , the ideas all fresh ,
Rumbling about your head, what will i say first!! What have i ,
learn`t from all these past years, have i learned at all.
Yes its been a hard slog , i did not even see the loads i carried,
I just carry those loads because , that`s my job , As mum.
Especially if there has been circumstances thrown your direction ,
Somehow you keep your head above water and you paddle "your feet ;like mad",
Till you feel 1 day you can actually swim. You have to swim, or you will,
sink,There is always floats, if you feel ,You are sinking, something happens,
Restoring your faith , takes along time if it can, be restored at all, Its hard.
This i can talk from experience through life's highways so to speak.
To be able to turn a negative into a positive is seemingly quite a craft!!!.
I call it surviving, Life can change from what you have always known,
In the flick of a switch. Till it happens to you, and you have not been there,
Never judge a book by its cover,. If you actualy take the time to Read,
The book, That`s why it`s called a cover,?To cover all that`s went on before.
The real story is in the book, If you have , empathy not sympathy!!.
The both are completely different, Sympathize, Yes feel sorry for them!!
Empathy you have felt this (lived ) so you have 100% understanding of,
The situation, then how dare you sit and mock or down, Try thinking before,
opening your gob, For now i know you know & knew which buttons to press.
Now on reflection your were dinging that bell like a woman possessed, .
I knew it , seems to be the order of  the game, Sad. Now a lot is done and said.
Hurt is raw, people are sore, and sick of hearinsh such , rubbish , yet that`s all,
I hear, is repeating, & bringing all i knew down.& twisting like some old dishcloth ,
Not realizing how or what you had spun, ? I think you well , aware of your actions.
I was complety oblivious , no more though, i see so much more than i ever did before,
Now as i sit and reflect on all that was said and done!!. My soul bare for all to see,
This i do not care for , as you found out i am 1 of a kind, why so much doubt.
Why the stabs in the back , when all you are doing is hearing a 1 sided story.
How fast everyone can judge, i am guilty also. I would never kick, when i know,
Not exactly what they have been through, knowing though its been hard,
Harder than most , " dull blows near enough back to back, sent me into some kind ,
of mentil block , but you stood and mocked & layed the boot in !!! All i can say is WHY,.
We will come to this one day ,When i meet you on the other side!!?. Will you be  different,
Or do we stay the same?. I wonder what realy happens when you are taking out the game.
One of your major pieces missing , trying to hold on by the fingertips, the skin of my teeth.
Then along comes something else to give me a double whammy ,just about,So much change,
 in such a short space of time, leading my life is completly diffrent from how you lead yours,
i see what your saying now,. I gave you my all , the doubt was spun , the rivers murky,
I stayed , was i the fool?. No,? Lessons learn`t all round i think? I learned , that will do me.
That will always be your problem, not mines for i know i am true that`s why! now i can,
 sit an laugh, The tears have been plenty i will tell you. As you seen and heard, what
a mixer you were, all this time dressed in sheep's clothing, A wolf waiting to pounce.
Little red hiding hood,? Comes to mind . i know that`s not the book of what am thinking,
but it realy is fitting . A hood to hide all the skulls and bones you have in your wardrobe.
I do this every day , put a face on to face the day , a front but its real, because thats all,
i have left, is the reality of all the worst nightmares, that have come true, Leading,
me in a path i definitly did never want to come, but here i am , doing what i said, .
I would never do , Never say never you, truly do not know, what is round that corner for you.