Sitting on A pen myte seem light work for many . U could just sit an doodle. Or share whats in your thoughts .
The pen is far more mightier than any sword . In 1word u can mean so many thingz
Realy do u think ? Wat a fekd up society we actualy do live in . I forgot how bad the people, not the world (ME) fekn sensible . Yip even i make mistakes and see when i do of-course there big onez . Just t whip that carpet from under my feet again just a reminder dont get complacent, or too comfie . Well fek it . Ill fall in a bucket o shit an come out smelling of roses huh. Everything has a yin an yang . Good an bad in everything thats sent to try us .its so easy just to shrivel up become a shell . Av got from there too here, It hasn`t been fun but its done i have survived the fall out . Fall in. Just be careful out there driving this crazy world.
The pen is far more mightier than any sword . In 1word u can mean so many thingz
Realy do u think ? Wat a fekd up society we actualy do live in . I forgot how bad the people, not the world (ME) fekn sensible . Yip even i make mistakes and see when i do of-course there big onez . Just t whip that carpet from under my feet again just a reminder dont get complacent, or too comfie . Well fek it . Ill fall in a bucket o shit an come out smelling of roses huh. Everything has a yin an yang . Good an bad in everything thats sent to try us .its so easy just to shrivel up become a shell . Av got from there too here, It hasn`t been fun but its done i have survived the fall out . Fall in. Just be careful out there driving this crazy world.
As i climb this ladder called life i get 1step up and the 3rd seems to be broken, So as i slide down this crazy shoot Called life
As
i reflect over the years , its so so easy to become stuck ,. I hope
these notes help & some kinda understanding, for some in a way , that sounds
like a poem lol in my head but i love to write an share :-)
How
fast it goes,tick tock never stopping, what tick tock,another few
seconds wasted,or did you do something,its great to be alone to sit and
reflect,especially at special times of the year, i have spoke with a few
people now, and it just, doesn`t feel like Christmas or are we forgetting
,how,,our life`s seem so crammed ,no time to reflect,we work our fingers
to the bone our minds in tatters,everyday a new battle,sad yet true,
there seems to be no point for some ,time has stopped for them, they
seem flung out,with no more to give? Sad,depressing,,what is going on
were we have no thought for our futures,yet we think of it 24/7?, o how
funny life is not funny haha,but you do have to learn to live a life,
when things have been so good ,but then its all snatched away, you`ve had
it all and lost it ,were do you start ,life is a roller-coaster and you truly do have to ride it for if you dont, what will be will be,,,ill
come back to this :-)
Time
moves so fast stops for no man times just keeps moving an so do we as
beings the planet everything lives an breathes , has a life span , some
changing from an ugly duckling to a beaut of a swan , some lives all r all
straight no cracks an bends in their roads but other peoples life`s so up
an down they might even seem like a real fruit case but nope they aren`t
out of madness comes sanity , or out of disorder comes order , if
everyone put 5 minutes of kindness in what a difference
As
i sit an reflect on what was an what should be an WHAT IS ? How can
things change so fast an the tusammi thats hit the family unit now the
shockwaves an the tremours an the terrors , right till the ripples of the
life that once was o how sad some a lot would say , Ave thought the
same a thousand times (y) theyr is no y an no answers its just 1 of those
things ?( those things) what are they ( taboo) are we not allowed to just
say it, out right, to me its been a fekin basta an if my faith wasnt as
strong i would not have even sought solace in or from the church y
shoulda go their if their wasa god y all this to my family my imidiate y
y y but the answer ( wat doesnt kill u makes u stronger) well whens ma
muscles gonna pop oot i expected to look like pop eye by now cause am
sik o wearin ma super woman an wonder woman so what now just walk aboot
in the scud? I that will get me noticed am sure an straight jacket, here i
come, lol but nope am not planning that either )( mind i could do with the
rest lol ) but i canny ave got my kids to watch grow an flourish an
hopefully become a great happy confident an smart an clever wee man, No
ones for ever, I do what, I do in the hope my youngest will be even just
happy, in life, that will do me , For the joy you`ve brought, Me i hope i can give u,
to give back to others who are, good to you or an have been in your past an in your
future , ure neice my grandaughter she is more special than she will
even realise , we might of lost
To heaven a wonderfull man who will allways walk beside us all, Just how he did, in life, he will always, be there even in death R.I.P billy we all miss u soo soo much , as for young billy, he has in a way got us through, the first 2 years of losing you , mad the twists an things, that come just to blow your tiny world wide apart so plz be thankfull for what you have, got, cause u just neva know wats for U xx
David,Life has been cruel to you for your 6 years the first,4,were just how it looks on the films ,the perfect family, mum , dad, bro,s an sister an bro inlaw, then the hand of fate reared its ugly head, Dont Know Y, things had to change so fast, if i could ,turn back time there is so much we could of done an if we coulda sped up the time there`s so much wee would of missed,out the cruel blow,You Have had to suffer in your so young childhood,maybe ure daddy was to go when you were young because when ure older its harder,U only knew ure daddy 5 years , You will, never forget ,the last 8 months of that were so painful for us all, You`ve been thrown from childhood to adulthood in such a short space of time, In your young years, they have been blown so wide apart, no wonder ure an angry wee man ,am your mum, i,ll take it all, If it means ure going to grow into a nice caring adult knowing, whats right fie wrong an whats fair, All i can do is my best, an if an when im stuck, I know ure daddy will never be far giving guidance,. You looked through, dads memory boxes an of all the things to cuddle, you , chose, your`e daddy`s toothbrush ,chancing even for a smell, you cuddled an cried, as if that was your`e daddy, My poor wee boy,I,m so sad when ure so sad, you,re, niece, was even there yet u still still shared your`e tears, usually you`re the big boy who wouldn`t dare, cry especially in-front of a girl, but she isn,t just anybody, shes ure niece ure family,. Skye had a wee tear for her dad too, but its not the same son , from what ure going through, You`re our wee soldier and what a weight u have carried on ure mighty wee shoulders, my wee man, u have grown so fast and U R the rock , Ure young to young to understand but its you, son that keeps me afloat, if it wasn`t for you, i would of probably been selfish by now, its hard been apart fie ure dad esp after 29 an a half years an would of stayed for longer but that wasn,t to be our fate, so now we have a blank canvas ,so to speak to fill with laughter,an tears an HAPPY-DAYS, you`re still such a young wee man , you have to be a young boy, before you can become a young man, so plz don`t try to grow so fast, let out whats deep inside, I know it hurts ,yo u dont , have to hide it ,you`ve been brave enough ,enjoy you`re childhood, what i would give to be able to change whats happened but no one could not the dr,s ,not dad, not mum ,not anyone, so if you want scream ure head of feel free, ill probably join u , You,ve held it too deep within now let it out what youv`e got inside of-course, you`re angry , I would feel cheated, I do an he was my husband ,even taking it out on you`re closest, but now its time to talk an not be angry ,remember the good times the 1z that make you happy , I know u can, I know u can remember when you want to ,I love you, my wee man, but i also need you to be a child, for you`re sake so we can let out whats deep inside,. The hurt the pain ,the anger the Y,z the hows an the buts, Life really is`nt fair, its what u make it supposedly) to make of it what we can This will be 1an a half years for ure daddy on the 26/7/11 1an a half year it only seems like yesterday he was here, DAVID2 I love u so much my special wee boy, Dont know what happened with note no 1,but it just wouldn`t fix,so I Have had to write, it all out again , an more ,an its called David 2, O my youngest pride an joy, If only i could fill ure head of all the good stuff an not so much o the ugly an the bad, but life is not a bed of roses, my wee man but ill do all that, I can, to make you enjoy what there is left of your Childhood.
To heaven a wonderfull man who will allways walk beside us all, Just how he did, in life, he will always, be there even in death R.I.P billy we all miss u soo soo much , as for young billy, he has in a way got us through, the first 2 years of losing you , mad the twists an things, that come just to blow your tiny world wide apart so plz be thankfull for what you have, got, cause u just neva know wats for U xx
David,Life has been cruel to you for your 6 years the first,4,were just how it looks on the films ,the perfect family, mum , dad, bro,s an sister an bro inlaw, then the hand of fate reared its ugly head, Dont Know Y, things had to change so fast, if i could ,turn back time there is so much we could of done an if we coulda sped up the time there`s so much wee would of missed,out the cruel blow,You Have had to suffer in your so young childhood,maybe ure daddy was to go when you were young because when ure older its harder,U only knew ure daddy 5 years , You will, never forget ,the last 8 months of that were so painful for us all, You`ve been thrown from childhood to adulthood in such a short space of time, In your young years, they have been blown so wide apart, no wonder ure an angry wee man ,am your mum, i,ll take it all, If it means ure going to grow into a nice caring adult knowing, whats right fie wrong an whats fair, All i can do is my best, an if an when im stuck, I know ure daddy will never be far giving guidance,. You looked through, dads memory boxes an of all the things to cuddle, you , chose, your`e daddy`s toothbrush ,chancing even for a smell, you cuddled an cried, as if that was your`e daddy, My poor wee boy,I,m so sad when ure so sad, you,re, niece, was even there yet u still still shared your`e tears, usually you`re the big boy who wouldn`t dare, cry especially in-front of a girl, but she isn,t just anybody, shes ure niece ure family,. Skye had a wee tear for her dad too, but its not the same son , from what ure going through, You`re our wee soldier and what a weight u have carried on ure mighty wee shoulders, my wee man, u have grown so fast and U R the rock , Ure young to young to understand but its you, son that keeps me afloat, if it wasn`t for you, i would of probably been selfish by now, its hard been apart fie ure dad esp after 29 an a half years an would of stayed for longer but that wasn,t to be our fate, so now we have a blank canvas ,so to speak to fill with laughter,an tears an HAPPY-DAYS, you`re still such a young wee man , you have to be a young boy, before you can become a young man, so plz don`t try to grow so fast, let out whats deep inside, I know it hurts ,yo u dont , have to hide it ,you`ve been brave enough ,enjoy you`re childhood, what i would give to be able to change whats happened but no one could not the dr,s ,not dad, not mum ,not anyone, so if you want scream ure head of feel free, ill probably join u , You,ve held it too deep within now let it out what youv`e got inside of-course, you`re angry , I would feel cheated, I do an he was my husband ,even taking it out on you`re closest, but now its time to talk an not be angry ,remember the good times the 1z that make you happy , I know u can, I know u can remember when you want to ,I love you, my wee man, but i also need you to be a child, for you`re sake so we can let out whats deep inside,. The hurt the pain ,the anger the Y,z the hows an the buts, Life really is`nt fair, its what u make it supposedly) to make of it what we can This will be 1an a half years for ure daddy on the 26/7/11 1an a half year it only seems like yesterday he was here, DAVID2 I love u so much my special wee boy, Dont know what happened with note no 1,but it just wouldn`t fix,so I Have had to write, it all out again , an more ,an its called David 2, O my youngest pride an joy, If only i could fill ure head of all the good stuff an not so much o the ugly an the bad, but life is not a bed of roses, my wee man but ill do all that, I can, to make you enjoy what there is left of your Childhood.
David,
life has been so cruel to you for your 6years the first 4 were how it
looks on films the perfect family,mum,dad,bro,s an sister niece, an
loads of comins an goings ,neva a dull moment ,ill say ,Then the hand of
fate reared its ugly head,Dont know the reason Y things had to change,
so fast, if i could turn back the clock, theyrs so much we coulda
done an if we coulda sped the time up theres so much we coulda
missed,we coulda missed out the ugly blow uve had to suffer in your so
young childhood,, Maybe ure daddy was to go when u were young 5 years u
had with him the last wasnt to good as he was just not well enuf esp the
last 8 months,that was so painfull for us all, Uve bn thrown from
childhood to adulthood in such a short space of time, In your young
years theyve been blown wide apart no wonder your angry,not all the time
but uve got deep inside an i need to get that out,ure an angry wee boy
Am ure mum u can shout at me i <ll takeit, if" means ure" gonna" grow
up" into a nice" carin adult, fair, suppose in" lot of ways just like
ure daddy al i can do," is my best and wen am stuk I know ure daddy
will never be far givin" me guidance you looked thru the memory
box " all , things too, cuddle , u picked dads " toothbrush ,
cuddled cryed ,a"" that was ur dad , poor wee boy so , sad ,when i
see u even" shared this time with neice, she seen ure " tears" big
boy wouldnt " normaly of dared ,cry, esp, in front of girls, but "
isnt any " body, " shes family ,skye had a tear for her dadddy, too ,
son its not " quite the" same, as what ure going thru,y our wee
soldier ,what a weight u " carry on ure mighty wee shoulders ,my wee
man ,U have grown so fast" U r the rock, ure young to understand
thats keeps me afloat , if it wasnt for u, i woulda probably been
selfish by now ,hard to b " apart from ure dad, we stayed
together 29an a half years,an woulda stayed longer, that wasnt to b
our fate,so now we have a blank cavas"so to speak to fill with
laughter an" happydays "Ure still such a young wee man,u have to be a
young boy , before u can become a young man ,plz dont tryto grow so
fast" let " out whats deep " inside , hurts hide uve " brave enuf
enjoy ure childhood what i would " give " to be able to " change
whats happened " no one, could want scream ure head off, feel
free to let out whats held within got ofcourse ure angry an u
take it out on ure " closest,but now its time to talk and remember
the, goodtimes" happy days,I love alos="" need="" child="" sake=""
hurt="" pain="" anger="" y="" hows="" buts="" life="" realy="" supposed="" make="" lets="" here="" xxx=""></ll>. This was the first letter to you son for 1 day way way in the future , when you have spread your wings, Once i had written what i had, I seen what had happened and tried to fix it at-least twice, It just was not fixing so i read what there was and decided to leave it for you 1 day , maybe it will have meanings, signs for you , I Know you are truly Intuitive too.
I am so Lucky to have such lovely children and so proud , My heart it pounds for my Children,
So as too keep them safe . I will put my big wings around us all till the storm blows over , or until the cows come home , That is what i as a mother, feel i have to do , & I love you so much , its second nature , To Look at you with loving eyes see that beautiful face, See you all in 1 place , That is life we need to keep going know time to stop, Especially regrets, You will have some too , as do us all,
. I Just want you to know i am there for you 24/7 all of your life, I can be , and when am not ,
Your sister an brothers will help you, for 1 thing you have a big family, That is for sure,
The ones who have been throughout will stay , the false ones we will weed them out , You are spot on,with your reports of people , am relay proud and delighted to say . We have to protect 1 another,
There is some nasty nasty, people about, As I Have told you many a time laugh with them all but trust none at all, Untill you feel comfier, In Your feelings and thoughts, You are intuitive, And i can
see you are well and truly gifted , You bring so much light in your own happy way , How could anyone, want to pull that apart , he is a child , It saddens me, Some people are just so false, it also angers me, Especially when you pick on MY KIDS, O I will rise , You wont like what you , see , for i am even scared of me, I relay will thank you , relay, you showed so much in such a short space of time. I am not glad, how it is, far from it,..
Time to forgive may never forget?
Now its so sad to see what might o been,
but the lessons ave learn,t, i couldnt go bk, to change who i am today is what i would miss
As long as your true to yourself, then it relay don`t matter whats any 1,s thoughts,
and never relay should ?? As its your life not any1 else`s, its such a shame people just have to get involved,
especially, when they think they have right`s, o yes some do have rights over you, but not to the extent of punishing you, or bullying you bully u into even thinking you are wrong an then you stop listening, to ure intuition ,,but its always there especially, when you`re at ure lowest, Its just waiting to come shining through an lighten ure darkness,, like a torch could do,When u can see light at the end of a tunnel you thought you would never even get out of let alone see, some light,, but time ,time, time it stops for no one, an even seem`s faster but its not its just you getting older, Now we see , too much too do and such little time to do it all in . We do what we can for the sake of every one, To lend a hand , not snatch it away, You can try try again, If they dont want your help there is nothing you or anyone else can do , and its so so sad to watch someone you love go down a sliding slope. You cannot be
there to catch everyone am afraid , Only the one`s who want to be truly saved , If you first dont succeed try try again, Honestly it would be so worth it, To see a healthy glow, your reflection looking healthy , Now that would be a great sight , am sure everyone will agree. You can only help so much ,
I am so Lucky to have such lovely children and so proud , My heart it pounds for my Children,
So as too keep them safe . I will put my big wings around us all till the storm blows over , or until the cows come home , That is what i as a mother, feel i have to do , & I love you so much , its second nature , To Look at you with loving eyes see that beautiful face, See you all in 1 place , That is life we need to keep going know time to stop, Especially regrets, You will have some too , as do us all,
. I Just want you to know i am there for you 24/7 all of your life, I can be , and when am not ,
Your sister an brothers will help you, for 1 thing you have a big family, That is for sure,
The ones who have been throughout will stay , the false ones we will weed them out , You are spot on,with your reports of people , am relay proud and delighted to say . We have to protect 1 another,
There is some nasty nasty, people about, As I Have told you many a time laugh with them all but trust none at all, Untill you feel comfier, In Your feelings and thoughts, You are intuitive, And i can
see you are well and truly gifted , You bring so much light in your own happy way , How could anyone, want to pull that apart , he is a child , It saddens me, Some people are just so false, it also angers me, Especially when you pick on MY KIDS, O I will rise , You wont like what you , see , for i am even scared of me, I relay will thank you , relay, you showed so much in such a short space of time. I am not glad, how it is, far from it,..
Time to forgive may never forget?
Now its so sad to see what might o been,
but the lessons ave learn,t, i couldnt go bk, to change who i am today is what i would miss
As long as your true to yourself, then it relay don`t matter whats any 1,s thoughts,
and never relay should ?? As its your life not any1 else`s, its such a shame people just have to get involved,
especially, when they think they have right`s, o yes some do have rights over you, but not to the extent of punishing you, or bullying you bully u into even thinking you are wrong an then you stop listening, to ure intuition ,,but its always there especially, when you`re at ure lowest, Its just waiting to come shining through an lighten ure darkness,, like a torch could do,When u can see light at the end of a tunnel you thought you would never even get out of let alone see, some light,, but time ,time, time it stops for no one, an even seem`s faster but its not its just you getting older, Now we see , too much too do and such little time to do it all in . We do what we can for the sake of every one, To lend a hand , not snatch it away, You can try try again, If they dont want your help there is nothing you or anyone else can do , and its so so sad to watch someone you love go down a sliding slope. You cannot be
there to catch everyone am afraid , Only the one`s who want to be truly saved , If you first dont succeed try try again, Honestly it would be so worth it, To see a healthy glow, your reflection looking healthy , Now that would be a great sight , am sure everyone will agree. You can only help so much ,
Life
is supposed to b mapped out, destiny wonder who decided mines? Wonder
if I, was a hang man in a previous life. Cause its sure kicking the arse
right out of being me, if i remember who me is? One day, then might it be to late
ave done what i was to do in my life? I dont agree ave got lots to do,
maybe one day i will b able to say ave done? But i doubt it as
i think that must be you`re dieing day. Life when ur young your invincible,
then you`re wantin to be 18 then 21 , then ur 30, and then ur ? How did i
get to 40 maybe feeling 100 , life also gets faster as u get older ,
this i defo know and harder when it should b gettin easier? For some,
not be every one that would be to good to be true an we canny have that ?. Every one happy, Peace and light every were friends shaking hands , they are relay saying , I Love you , that is a quote from a song what a wonderful life? Now i know not everyone who smiles at you is your friend far from it more like they cannot wait on sticking a knife right into you, twisting as they go , if only they had some light , They cannot seem to find any , and you seriously wonder why, Ask any one the answers are so clear , it only takes a little common sense,
To weed out the lies from the truth. Some just will never want to see , they need the most love,
the Biggest of Hugs, They have forgotton just how nice and lovely life truly is, yes its painful,
No One promised it was going to be any thing else , its called life. Peace Love and Light to all :)
To weed out the lies from the truth. Some just will never want to see , they need the most love,
the Biggest of Hugs, They have forgotton just how nice and lovely life truly is, yes its painful,
No One promised it was going to be any thing else , its called life. Peace Love and Light to all :)
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